How to Spice Up Your Sex Life Before You Get to the Bedroom
Every aspect of your relationship is as unique as the two individuals involved. Your communication, likes,
dislikes, relatives and sex are completely unique to the two of you. This is a very important consideration when it
comes to the point where you want to improve your sex life.
To rekindle the fire in your bedroom therefore requires an understanding of each others personality, an honest
assessment of the relationship you have and your current circumstances. Failing to address these three core aspects
will only result in short term changes in the sex department regardless of how much kink you bring into the
It has been said that the mind is the most powerful sex organ. Those who appreciate this fact have achieved the
highest levels of sexual satisfaction. You therefore need to start with your mind when looking to spice up your sex
Once that is covered, you are well on your way to what others consider a fairy tale bedroom story. Once you are
in the right frame of mind there are a number of things you can do to turn the little sparks that have been in your
bedroom into a raging sexual fire.
1. Begin with yourself
While most of the tips on how to spice up your sex life tell you what you can do for your partner, these can only
succeed after you have taken care of you. For you to successfully spice things up, you need to focus on what makes
you feel sexy.
This calls for you to have a sexy state of mind, a sexy state of dress or undress, a sexy environment and a sexy
anything else you want. You are fifty percent of the sexual relationship you are working on and that means you are
half the solution that is needed to make a difference.
2. Be assertive
You need to occasionally take charge of things in the sex department. It not only communicates the fact that you
are very involved in what is going on, but it also serves as an educative session on things you enjoy doing and
being done to you. This is not only in regards to the sexual activities themselves but also has to do with the
various other aspects.
Ask your partner to dress up in a way that you find sexually attractive, choose where and when to have sex and
include the things that are fun and kinky for you. Taking control of your sexual experiences will often result in
greater satisfaction for you which in turn makes you more willing to give your partner a similar level of
3. Break the rules and the routine
Rules and routine are the worst excitement killers. If you know what will happen before it starts, there is no way
you can get excited about it.
Throwing in sexy surprises is a sure way of firing up your sex life. There is always a thrill in doing something
that you would not do under normal circumstances.
Depending on how far the two of you are willing to go, a few broken rules will go a long way towards making
things a lot more interesting for you and your partner.
You do not have to go all the way but a few intimate moments can be a great build up towards an awesome sexual
encounter. The more creative you can get with your surprises, the better things are going to be.
4. Make sex a priority
With a busy personal, professional and family life, sex can easily become something you do when there is time and
energy left after everything else has been done. Prioritizing sex is one of the most important things when you are
working to spice up your sex life. It means making time for sex, actively thinking of ways to make it better and ensuring that you are energetic and
enthusiastic when going into it.
5. Work on your relationship
While sex is a big part of your relationship, it is not everything in your relationship. Just as problems with sex
affect your relationship, problems in your relationship are bound to affect your sex. If you are constantly working
to improve your relationship you will in many ways be working on
improving your sex life.
Having covered these fundamental areas, you can then go into the more instant solutions such as shopping for
sexy clothing, experimenting with toys and role playing, acting out fantasies and other such things. Combining both
the long term and instant solutions is the best way to spice up your sex life.